come on in and take a read
Welcome to the betrayal trauma therapist’s online blog. Our intention is to share stories, resources and information to help you feel less alone in your betrayal and story. We see you. We are with you. We hope this helps.
the betrayal blog
I Blamed Myself for Their Betrayal…
If you've been betrayed, you might find yourself drowning in self-blame. "Was I not enough? Could I have prevented this?" But the truth is—infidelity was their choice, not a reflection of your worth. Blaming ourselves can feel like control—if I caused it, then I can fix it. But the reality is, you cannot control another person’s integrity. What you can control is how you heal from here. What if healing from betrayal didn’t mean blaming yourself—but finally releasing what was never yours to carry? Overcoming Self-Blame After Infidelity is a trauma-informed journey designed to gently guide you out of shame and into self-compassion.
Anger after Betrayal
84% of betrayed partners report anger greater than they’ve ever experienced before. But what happens when that anger starts to control you? When it feels like letting go would mean letting them off the hook?
Too often, anger after betrayal is misunderstood or judged, even by professionals. Some have been told their anger is irrational or even part of the problem. That’s not only unfair—it’s damaging. Anger is a normal, healthy response to betrayal. It’s protective, it’s motivating, and it makes perfect sense.
So, how do you honor your anger without letting it lead to toxic behaviors? How do you express it in ways that serve your healing instead of sabotaging it?
This blog explores the science and emotional reality of anger after betrayal, offering actionable tips to validate your feelings, process them in healthy ways, and ultimately take control of your healing journey. If you’ve ever felt trapped by your anger, this is the insight and support you’ve been waiting for.
Reclaiming Identity after Infidelity
When betrayal shatters your sense of self, it can feel like your identity has been ripped away. The pain, the self-doubt, and the constant “what ifs” become overwhelming, leaving you wondering who you are without the life you thought you knew. In this post, I share the messy, raw journey of healing after betrayal trauma—reclaiming my identity, my joy, and my purpose. If you’re looking to rebuild and rediscover your true self after betrayal, read on for insights, practical steps, and the hope that healing is truly possible.
The Impact of Betrayal on the Brain
Betrayal trauma can have a profound impact on the brain, triggering intense emotional responses like anxiety, hypervigilance, and mood swings. The amygdala, your brain's internal alarm, often reacts to both real and perceived threats, making even subtle changes in your environment feel overwhelming. Learn how betrayal trauma influences the fight, flight, or freeze response, and discover effective techniques for regulating your nervous system, including deep breathing, soothing your senses, and connecting with supportive people. Healing takes time, but with the right tools, you can begin the journey to recovery.